Life isn't always easy. Sometimes you want. And want. And want.
And you don't get it.

Sometimes you don't understand anything.
Sometimes you fall for the eighth time and wonder if you are righteous anymore.
Sometimes you think, "Does everyone see through me?"
Sometimes you think, "I'm the odd one and no one understands. I'm all alone."

Does God hear prayers?
Is this Christianity cultural? Are we just following people? What is all this hanging out about? When we are old, will it last?

Sometimes I ask God if he really thinks that I enjoy my life at all.
Sometimes I hate everything about every situation in my life.
And sometimes I pray, and Jesus says, "Be still."
He puts his hand through my hair.
He says, "He is your brother."
He says, "That is your sister."

Sometimes He shows me my hope isn't in Him.
Sometimes He lets me lust after everything that isn't Himself.
And His eyes bleed tears of joy for me every second of every day.
He waits for me to wake up in the morning.
He rouses me in the night and says, "I want to hear your voice."

He wants my love.