There is a big, metal bird staring at me. He seems friendly enough, but he doesn't say much. I stare back and wonder if he cares that his feet are buried in wood mulch. He is the king of his corner. Equal parts showman and security I presume.

"Hey."

I look around, wondering if I'm losing my mind.

"Hey. Over here!"

I search the courtyard and find a woman with a cane standing in the shadows of a balcony overhang.

"Would you be offended if I smoke?" she asks in a pressing alto voice.

"Nah. That's fine by me," I reply.

She lights up and stands quietly—shifting her weight in her Crocs while enjoying the smooth flavor of a Misty Light.

She finishes quickly and walks away in silence. I look at the bird and wonder what he's thinking. Just imagine what he has seen and heard as he is perched motionless between the day lilies.

I glance around and see a "No Smoking" sign and smile. It's strange to me that we have picked smoking as a great evil to be exterminated. I've often heard people say incredibly harsh and cruel things to smokers as they nurse their habit. Isn't it odd that it is socially acceptable to shun a smoker, but if I told a man to stop cheating on his wife I am considered a prude and over the line? Truly, which will hurt us as a society more? Dying a few years earlier or destroying your family because you've followed your lusts?

Now you won't see me lighting up any time soon, and I wouldn't recommend anyone does. Smoking should be of public concern, and relationships by their very nature are private and personal. But if we really care about our friends and coworkers, why can't we roll up our sleeves and get to what really matters? It isn't about smoking or not smoking. It's not about legislating morality (even though we often do). It's about speaking the truth in love.

The bird is still staring. Standing and staring. He's like us I suppose. Or we're like him. We watch as the world goes by—cemented to our fears and tolerance. We've legitimized our inaction as respect and focused our efforts on easy targets like smoking and under-age drinking. Maybe it's time we tackle why people smoke to begin with.